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facebook_movieJohns Hopkins’ Homewood campus is doubling for Harvard today. A movie about Facebook called “Social Network” is using its paths of erudition — for a day or two, anyway. No complaints here — well one maybe. I’m sure the story of Mark Zuckerberg — the guy behind Facebook, is an interesting one. But it feels weird, like the movie’s actually about Facebook.

It’s kind of like making a movie about Mountain Dew or Trident. I understand the ins and outs of multi-tiered advertising campaigns and media saturation. I also understand this is a biopic. But it feels like the lead in this film should be a character named, Facebook.

He’d go around making friend suggestions, weighing in on status updates, and tricking you into looking at him when you’re supposed to be working.

Then, out of nowhere, things go wonky. A crime is committed. And you know who we’re supposed to think is behind it: that shifty Twitter fellow. But the offender turns out to be… dunh, dunh, dunh… Youtube.

Thank you for indulging me.

Jesse Eisenberg, the star of “Zombieland,” helms what I’m betting will be a serious snooze fest. I have it on good authority that Mark Zuckerberg is nothing if not completely bland. Meaning, my friend’s friends said they met him at a party in LA and he is not sexy. I have a feeling the film’s writers and director would have you believe otherwise.

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I’ve been benched by the weather. Anybody wanna lay out later? Catch a few rays?

I defer to a silly little song about blizzards in Dixie.

“On a lucky Monday, Mrs. Braintree
All your lanes are waxen silver
And the stores are loot for vagabonds
It’s coming down
Go home! Go home and take a snow day, Mrs. Braintree”

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